The following post was done by trained professionals. Do not attempt to recreate these events outside of New York. Children, do not try to imitate these situations, it may result in death or dismemberment.
In the past few days, two dear friends have had some terrible spills as they walked along the streets of New York. My friend, "La Diva," fell as she crossed 76th Street on the Upper West Side. It was a horrible fall and she needed multiple stitches and a black and blue mark covered most of her face.
I spoke to her after the fall and she told me that almost before she hit the ground, she could hear people shouting and coming to her aid. She was helped up and an ambulance was called instantly.
Likewise, the Scottsman, my boss, took two falls. Yesterday he was with his daughter and they were surrounded by people in a flash. He was fine and walked it off. As we were chatting about his fall this morning, I told him about La Diva's fall and apparently he felt the need to "one-up" her.
Today he was walking with a client and fell. Again, strangers crowded around to help him but this time, he fell in front of Hermes. A staff member saw him and insisted he come into the store where he sat down and they offered him a brandy to steady his nerves.
So what have we learned, kids? If you must take a fall, do so in New York City, where help is only a few steps away. When you choose your location, fall in front of Hermes because they offer free drinks for the gravitationally challenged.
Kitty- if you are reading this post, please don't start throwing yourself at the ground for free drinks!
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